So I did some more testing today and sure enough found myself in the adopting/disconnected loop again.    For me the key to fixing this was under the controller section. I unticked the box to be discoverable on L2 (worried it may have been pushing out the internal docker IP and not the unraid IP) and then did the tick on the box for overriding hostname/IP and set the IP to which is my unRAID box IP.    After this and allowing devices to re-adopt everything is workin
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