After a few rough starts, I have successfully achieved my goal of building a NAS with working Thunderbolt networking connectivity to a Macbook Pro.
I've been able to read and write to my encrypted NVME raidz array at 2GB/s with this setup.
Unraid 6.12.13
Hardware:
* ASUS X670-P WIFI
* Ryzen 7600
* Kingston 32GB DDR4 RAM ECC
* 3x 4TB NVME ZFS raidz
* 4x 16TB HDD
* ASUS ThunderboltEX 4
The ThunderboltEX 4 card is finicky and I had issues with soft reboots hard-locking until I changed PCIe slots.
Once plugged in, the thunderbolt0 interface needs to be configured and brought up:
ifconfig thunderbolt0 up
ifconfig thunderbolt0 192.168.22.1 # or whatever IP you want
ifconfig thunderbolt0 mtu 9000 # if you want jumbo frames, although this doesn't appear to affect performance for me
You'll need to manually set the Thunderbolt Bridge interface on macOS to a relevant IP (192.168.22.2).
I haven't figured out how to automatically bring the interface up on Unraid yet, and there are still some reliability issues which appear to be due to the card, or potentially older Linux kernel version on current stable Unraid.
EDIT: I also tried the ASUS USB4 PCIe as well, hearing that it was apparently more reliable for Thunderbolt, however only the USB part of it works (at least in Unraid 6.12.13), which is likely due to `thunderbolt: probe of 0000:0c:00.0 failed with error -110` in `dmesg`. I have to yet test with a newer kernel.