I did some more troubleshooting this morning and found that the flash drive was not responding or appearing in BIOS, had to repair it in windows, pulled everything off and reloaded everything onto a new flash drive, reassigned license and all that and i seem to have stability so far, at least a lot more so than i was getting last night. Also replaced the CMOS this morning since i was having odd time issues with unraid and the bios.
Only thing repurposed would be all the storage, and case. MB and CPU are from gaming station (bought 2016), PSU and RAM were bought a week ago. Standoffs are all good, i do have an UPS but was troubleshooting from both wall power and UPS last night, BIOS is set to not restart.
The clean restart is whats confusing me most. when server is stable and i even watched it in command line, sitting on login and then it appears to get sent some command to reboot, the two beeps from MB speaker happen and it reboots. it does not ask for a parity check when it comes back up after that issue happens.