Just an update, I still can't reproduce this issue, I was looking at other threads that reported the same problem before and it happened with various disk/parity size combos, 2 to 4TB, 4 to 8TB, etc, so and since I could never reproduce it with the small SSDs I have on my test server I tried with 4 and 8TB disks that I had available, it's now past the old parity size and no errors, I'm going to let it finish but I would expect that if there were errors they would have already been detected by now:
Next I'll reproduce the exact configuration you had on your server and try again, luckily I can get it exactly the same with the disks I have, but I'll need to remove disks from 3 different servers, so it's going to take a few days/weeks.